In telling me that "sensored" is not in spell check, the computer offered the following words in its stead:
Sneezewort - A plant with multiple uses, though poisonous to livestock
Xenosauridae - A genus of lizards known as "knobby lizards"
Sneezeworts - As in plural of sneezewort.
I stucked with sensored, as in "the items were sensored to prevent theft."
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Friday, April 3, 2009
Thursday, April 2, 2009
In discussing the Miley Cyrus/Radiohead feud -
Myself - "When she told the radio hosts it was Radiohead, they started dissing on them, but you know if Radiohead was in the studio, they would be sucking them off. Proverbially, proverbially."
Micah - with incredulity - "For realz, for realz. And you would, too and you know it! If they said they wanted to do a Racket exclusive, and that's all you had to do, you'd say 'Point the way.'"
Sometimes I can't handle Micah's sudden outbursts.
Myself - "When she told the radio hosts it was Radiohead, they started dissing on them, but you know if Radiohead was in the studio, they would be sucking them off. Proverbially, proverbially."
Micah - with incredulity - "For realz, for realz. And you would, too and you know it! If they said they wanted to do a Racket exclusive, and that's all you had to do, you'd say 'Point the way.'"
Sometimes I can't handle Micah's sudden outbursts.
Monday, March 30, 2009
No, Mr. Sushi place worker.
No, I will NOT stop singing Styx at the top of my lungs. I am the renegade who had it made. (Breaks into face-melting (air) guitar solo!)
In what I claim to be a fair "you buy, I fly" tradeoff, I got myself an ice cream cone while getting my manager's El Pollo Loco. I don't think Mad Cow would be as good of a name for a competitor.
Agressively Mediocre in Every Single Way
"Digital Editions: The Fastest Growing Format in Magazines." Fucking DUH. With print collapsing on itself in the current model, and with DVD-based mags nearly extinct, Digital seems to be one of the only ones still around, Racket included. I don't know where I was going with this, I was just annoyed.
This weekend was productive.
FRIDAY = 
SATURDAY =
Sunday =
- Woke up early to work at the Cabazon store. Prank called the staff. Something about pissing off the wife and looking for chocolates big enough to put midol in.
- Got drunk with Mike and found ourselves drunkenly walking to several sushi places before settling on the party platter of super-shitty pre-made stuff at Vons. Ate that on the way to CVS where we got our standard chips and spicy bean dip. I have a bruise where Mike hit me in the elbow. I don't want to know how his nuts felt after getting kicked.
- Lots of Top Gear. Jeremy LOVES the Ford GT!
- Got drunk with Mike and found ourselves drunkenly walking to several sushi places before settling on the party platter of super-shitty pre-made stuff at Vons. Ate that on the way to CVS where we got our standard chips and spicy bean dip. I have a bruise where Mike hit me in the elbow. I don't want to know how his nuts felt after getting kicked.
SATURDAY =
- Woke up, got post-booze burger.
- Yelled at some cyclists to put on a shirt.
- Paid Dues, where I told everyone to get their head in the game and got a hi-five from B-Real for "All my help." I never talked to B-Real. But I appreciated it. Atmosphere, money and a free shirt.
- Talked to Karlo and Veronica about a print Racket. If there is anyone I want on my team, it's them.
- On-stage is cool, sound booth is better.
Sunday =
- Scared some shoplifter who ripped us off. On the other side of the mall. I rule.
- Arrested a shoplifter family. Mom was teaching the 14 year old how to steal. What a bitch.
- I think I have a date. In San Diego. So far, my feet have remained firmly on the floor and not in my mouth. I swear, if some women weren't so damned gorgeous, I wouldn't make an ass out of myself nearly as much. I turn into Lenny from Of Mice and Men and pet their head and tell them they're pretty. TIl their neck breaks.
- Drank two Hangar 24 Pale Ales. Delish.
- Write in this thing.
- SLEEEEEEP
Sunday, March 29, 2009
An actual conversation
Caitlin: What is Don't Stop Believing About anyways?
The Emperor: The Tooth Fairy
Caitlin: Figures. I thought it was about prostitutes. Gay ones.
The Emperor: It's ACTUALLY about the Cabazon Dinosaurs.
Caitlin: Gay ones?
The Emperor: Yes.
Caitlin: I knew it! You know how I know you're gay? You like gay dinosaurs.
The Emperor: I don't like them like them, but I respect their love. Do you know the divorce rate for straight dinos?
The Emperor: The Tooth Fairy
Caitlin: Figures. I thought it was about prostitutes. Gay ones.
The Emperor: It's ACTUALLY about the Cabazon Dinosaurs.
Caitlin: Gay ones?
The Emperor: Yes.
Caitlin: I knew it! You know how I know you're gay? You like gay dinosaurs.
The Emperor: I don't like them like them, but I respect their love. Do you know the divorce rate for straight dinos?
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